How to deal with constant conflict at home?

I live with my husband and my mother in law (father in law, passed away - 20 years back). My husband and I have been married for last 5 years and are both about 40 years old. It is a second marriage for both of us. Before our marriage, he lived with his mother and I lived alone for about 7 years. I am a working girl, very independent and well versed with housekeeping. When I got married, for one year, things were great as I didn’t question anything that was happening in the house for 1 full year - giving everyone time to understand each other’s needs. After a year, when I understood that they both will never consider my convenience unless their life is undisturbed. They lived in a 2 BKH, perfect for the both of them but they were so stuck and arrogant about their ways that they didn’t notice - I was miserable. Even my husband never realised till I spoke. I asked him to allow me to switch on the lights when I got ready for office because he was working from home. I asked to free the bathroom cause both them would want to occupy the bathroom at their own sweet time. I was living in a 2 bhk alone, and I shifted my entire world in 1 single cupboard but my MIL, won’t allow me to change the rotten kitchen dabbas. She is so possessive about her supremacy on the house and the son. She is not great health wise - heart patient, sugar, bp. So any conflict where I don’t agree with her comes with a threat of her health getting affected. My husband is always busy with work - even on weekends. He is always just sitting with his laptop. Anytime, when I feel upset with how condescending and insulting my MIL is, my husband makes sure that he blame shifts and tell me how immature, illiterate and insensitive I am to hold a grudge with an old woman. After many fights, we moved into a better place where all 3 of us are much happier but it is pinned as a favour dome to me. My husband says I have no appreciation for everything that everyone has done for me. I am extremely sad, disappointed and I don’t know what to do? I feel like if I leave, both mother and son can live peacefully without any conflict.